Boom!

These life moments...markers.

Like when layers, rings of sediment of different colors, dug out of the ancient ground tell the history of their culmination. These markers flood back sometimes, it is like getting hit by a train...when you are nowhere near a train track. You find yourself disarmed and stunned by the power these markers still hold within you.
I had a lighthouse moment in my life once...a person being my lighthouse...and I, the proverbial lost boat on the ocean, hit the rocks anyway.

Looking back it seems so clear how lost I was that not even a beacon of hope that this person was could steer me straight.

I am speaking annoyingly metaphorically - I know.
Speaking plain would sound like a pitiful tale of regret and woebegone tale spinning. It is not really like that...just typical What If moments in life...self examination and self judgment.

Things managed to fall into place....eventually.

I just read the definition of "proverbial" 5x to make sure I was using it correctly and I still have no idea if I am.
This is what happens when you don't go to university kids.
Stay in school you dumb fucks.

JFC I am so tempted to delete this blog from 2004 to now...15 years of online journaling that finally seems so silly and useless.